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When speaking up feels impossible

Assertiveness Support Across The North East

Therapy to help you communicate more confidently, set boundaries, and stop putting everyone else first.

  • 44 Practitioners
  • 6 North East clinics
  • Free First Pathway call

Understanding assertiveness

Assertiveness is a skill, not a personality trait.

Being assertive means expressing your thoughts, feelings, and needs in a clear and honest way, while also respecting others. It sits between passivity, where you put your own needs last, and aggression, where you override the needs of others.

Most people who struggle with assertiveness are not naturally passive. They have learned over time, often through early experiences, that expressing themselves leads to conflict, rejection, or disapproval. That learning can be unlearned.

Therapy for assertiveness is practical and skills-focused. You will develop ways to communicate more directly, say no without excessive guilt, and hold your limits in situations that previously left you feeling frustrated or overlooked.

Common signs

How assertiveness shows up, and what can help

Common signs

  • Saying yes when you really mean no
  • Feeling guilty after standing up for yourself
  • Avoiding sharing opinions in case others disagree
  • Struggling to give or receive criticism calmly
  • Worrying constantly about upsetting other people
  • Feeling resentful but not knowing how to raise it
  • Agreeing to things and regretting it immediately
  • Difficulty asking for what you need

Therapies that can help

Different people respond to different approaches. Your therapist agrees a personalised plan with you, which may draw on:

The Pathway Team matches you to a therapist experienced in supporting people with assertiveness, at your chosen location.

A simple first move

Not sure where to start? Talk it through with the Pathway Team.

Request a callback

Who you might work with

Therapists with expertise in supporting people with assertiveness

Browse the full team, or let the Pathway Team match you.

When to reach out

If it is costing you, it is worth addressing.

When difficulty asserting yourself starts affecting your relationships, your wellbeing, or your sense of self-worth, therapy can help. You do not need a diagnosis or a crisis moment to reach out.

The Pathway Team at Select Psychology will help you find the right therapist for where you are right now. A free Pathway call is the first step.

Where we offer this

Support for assertiveness across the North East

Select Psychology Tynemouth clinic

Tynemouth

1 Tynemouth Road, NE30 4AY

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Select Psychology Newcastle clinic

Newcastle

The Grainger Suite, Dobson House, Regent Centre, NE3 3PF

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Questions before you start

What people usually ask

1 What is assertiveness training?

Assertiveness training helps you learn to express your thoughts, feelings, and needs clearly and respectfully. It is not about becoming aggressive or demanding. It is about finding a way to communicate honestly without guilt, and to hold your limits without feeling that you have done something wrong.

2 Will assertiveness training help me say no without feeling guilty?

Yes. Learning to say no is one of the core skills in assertiveness work. Therapy helps you understand why saying no feels so difficult, and gives you practical strategies for setting limits in a way that feels honest and manageable. Over time, most people find it becomes much easier.

3 Is being unassertive the same as being shy?

Not necessarily. Some people who struggle to assert themselves are quietly confident in many areas of life but find it difficult to stand up for themselves in specific situations, such as at work or in close relationships. Assertiveness difficulties can affect anyone, regardless of personality type.

4 How long does assertiveness therapy take?

This depends on the person and the situations involved. Many people notice meaningful progress within 6 to 12 sessions. Your therapist will work with you at a pace that feels right and will regularly review how things are going.

In the meantime

Small things that can help right now.

  • Notice when you agree and later regret it
  • Practice saying no in low-stakes situations first
  • Write down your needs before a hard conversation
  • Your needs are as valid as anyone else's
  • Pause before responding when you feel pressured

From the blog

Helpful reading on this

Client Case Study: Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)

This CBT case study shows how Cognitive Behavioural Therapy helped a client overcome binge eating, improve self-esteem, manage stress, and achieve sustainable weight loss. Through techniques such as food diaries, meal planning, identifying emotional triggers, and developing assertiveness skills, the client gained greater control over their thoughts and behaviours. As a result, they stopped binge eating, lost 12kg, improved their confidence, and developed long-term strategies for maintaining both their mental and physical wellbeing.

Select Psychology Team · 13 Jul 2016

Read article

The Step-by-Step Guide to the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Process

The cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) process typically involves an initial assessment, setting therapy goals, identifying unhelpful thought patterns, learning practical coping strategies, and applying new skills between sessions. CBT is a structured, evidence-based therapy that helps people manage anxiety, depression, stress, phobias, and other mental health challenges by changing negative thinking and behaviours.

Select Psychology Team · 9 Jan 2026

Read article

What Happens in a CBT Session? A Step-by-Step Guide

A CBT session typically starts with a brief check-in, followed by a discussion about your current challenges, thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. Your therapist will help you identify unhelpful thinking patterns, develop practical coping strategies, and set a small action plan to practise between sessions. Most CBT sessions last around 50 minutes and are focused on helping you achieve specific mental health goals.

Select Psychology Team · 23 Jan 2026

Read article

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